Song lyrics to Money is a Problem, Music by Nicholas Brodszky, Lyrics by Sammy Cahn, as performed in Ten Thousand Bedrooms by Dean Martin, Jules Munshin
Dean Martin: Money is a problem, is a problem
A problem only the rich can comprehend
Jules Munshin: If money is a problem is a problem
I wish I had
A couple of problems to spend
Together: If we just had a little bit of time to spare
We could form a society for the protection of the poor unhappy millionaires
Together: Money is a problem, is a problem
Dean Martin: A Texan begins to learn it when he’s two
Jules Munshin: If you want to be the happy chap you used to be
Sir, you ought to give all your millions to a schnook like me
Dean Martin: Please let me keep a million in case of vagrancy
Together: Money is a problem (Is a problem)
But say the word and I’ll gladly trade problems with you.
You would? Like that!
Jules Munshin: If I were a millionaire …
Dean Martin: Okay, you’re a millionaire.
Jules Munshin: I’d buy me a couple of yachts real quick and keep one as a spare
If I had a lot of loot …
Dean Martin: Well, let’s say you had a lot of loot
Jules Munshin: I’d find me a tailor to whip me up a platinum pin-striped suit
Dean Martin: I just can’t continue this charade with you …
Arthur, I like you too much to ever trade with you …
Jules Munshin: Don’t like me so much … sir.
Together: Money is a problem, is a problem
A problem that only wealthy folks pursue
Dean Martin: I know from where you stand a million bucks is fun
But too much gold can burn you just like too much sun.
Jules Munshin: But I don’t want to be a millionaire
I just want to live like one
Together: Money is a problem is a problem
And any millionaire will tell you it’s true
Boo hoo
And any millionaire will tell you it’s true