Horrors of Spider Island – a cheesy, bad monster movie about 8 showgirls & their manager marooned on a desert island. And there’s a were-spider?
Horrors of Spider Island (1960) starring Alexander D’Arcy
In short, Horrors of Spider Island is a cheesy, bad, exploitation film wrapped around a cheesy, bad, monster movie. The basic plot has a group of “dancers” going to Singapore as part of a tour. Their plane goes down on a deserted island. They find shelter – the home of a dead scientist, trapped in a giant spider web.
The sleazy tour manager tries seducing multiple dancers, until he’s bitten by a strange spider creature, and runs off into the jungle. The beautiful ladies fill their days with swimming, posing for the camera, and cat fights. And, the occasional murder by something. Which the audience knows is the mutated manager, but the girls don’t. Just before their food runs out, they’re found by two more handsome men. Yay! Do they leave immediately? No, of course not! They have a party with the new men, the were-spiders monster attacks, After a few more murders, the survivors accidentally discover that the were-spider’s afraid of fire. So, using flares, they chase it in an incredibly bad pool of quicksand, it dies, they leave. That’s really it.
It’s simply a bad movie. It’s a German film, so the American version has everyone dubbed. Even Alexander D’Arcy, who spoke fluent English. Have I anything nice to say about Horrors of Spider Island? Well, at least that had the sense to only film the were-spider from behind, or in the shadows, because the makeup’s really bad.
It’s been mercilessly mocked by the Mystery Science Theater 3000 crew — and many others — and deservedly so.
Eight sexy showgirls and their macho manager survive a plane crash and take refuge on a remote tropical island. As the gals adjust to the heat and humidity by shedding most of their clothes, they also meet one of their new neighbors: a dead scientist found caught in a giant web.
Cast of characters
- Harald Maresch … Joe
- Helga Franck … Georgia. Gary’s assistant, who becomes more than a little jealous of the beautiful dancers they’re stranded with.
- Alexander D’Arcy (Man on a Tightrope) … Gary Webster. Manager of the tour.
- Helga Neuner … Ann
- Rainer Brandt … Bobby. One the of two rescuers, who finds true love with one of the girls. Aww! Right before the were-spider kills him.
- Dorothee Parker … Gladys
- Gerry Sammer … May
- Eva Schauland … Nelly
- Helma Vandenberg … Kate
- Elfie Wagner … Linda
- Barbara Valentin … Babs
- Walter Faber … Mike Blackwood