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I Hate Dogs and Cats [song lyrics]

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Song lyrics to I Hate Dogs and Cats, Music and Lyrics by Steve Allen, Performed by Sherman Hemsley in Alice in Wonderland 1985
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Song lyrics to I Hate Dogs and Cats, Music and Lyrics by Steve Allen, Performed by Sherman Hemsley in Alice in Wonderland 1985

I hate dogs and I hate cats,
I’m also not too fond of bats,
I’m a helpless little fellow
Consequently … rather yellow.

Now you may think that dogs are sweet,
Since they love to snuggle at your feet,
But to me, they’re oh so large
That I tremble when they charge.

Now certain words, like big and small,
Mean what? Would you please tell me?
To me, all cats are ten feet tall
So I worry … when they smell me.

I run from owls, I hide from hawks,
I scurry from whatever squawks.
I’m a coward from my whiskers to my spats,
I hate dogs and cats!

[instrumental, dancing]

Now certain words, like big and small,
Mean what? Would you please tell me?
To me, all cats are ten feet tall
So I worry … when they smell me.

I run from owls, I hide from hawks,
I scurry from whatever squawks.
I’m a coward from my whiskers to my spats,
But I tell you straight,
I really hate …

Owls!
Hawks!
Bats!
I hate dogs and cats!

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