The Giant Spider Invasion

The Giant Spider Invasion (1975) starring Steve Brodie, Barbara Hale, Alan Hale Jr.

A black hole hits North Wisconsin and opens a door to other dimensions. Giant 15 meter spiders emerge from it …. And they have an appetite for human flesh! Dr. Jenny Langer and Dr. Vance from NASA try to save the world from The Giant Spider Invasion.

Review

The Giant Spider Invasion is one of those B-movies that’s so bad, it’s fun to watch and make fun of with your friends. Bad effects, writing, etc. The basic plot is: giant spiders cross interstellar distances using tiny black holes (?) to land in northern Wisconsin. There, virtually everyone is a small-town hick and unlikable. The spiders grow, attack, and eat people, while brave scientists work up a gadget to seal the black hole.

Seriously, that’s it. As someone from Wisconsin, I’m grateful that the people aren’t like this. I should be offended by the portrayal …. But it’s so stupid, I’m too busy laughing at them.

Cast

• Steve Brodie (The Beast from 20,000 Fathoms) as Dr. J.R. Vance of NASA. You mean there are women scientists? in 1975? Despite that, an enjoyable, middle-aged protagonist.
• Barbara Hale (Perry Mason) as Dr. Jenny Langer. The female scientist & protagonist.
• Alan Hale, Jr. (Gilligan’s Island, The Inspector General) as Sheriff Jones. The sheriff who spends the majority of the film on the phone. Affable, but not very effective.
• Leslie Parrish (Three on a Couch, Li’l Abner) as Ev Kester. The alcoholic wife of Dan, who’s willing to “jump” her niece’s boyfriend, Dave. To describe their marriage as a love/hate relationship is charitable.
• Robert Easton as Dan Kester. Nasty, abusive, cheating, pot-growing farmer who thinks he can get rich by passing off the spiders’ pods as diamonds.
• Christiane Schmidtmer as Helga. Waitress at Dutch’s bar/diner, and Dan’s adultery partner.
• Kevin Brodie as Dave Perkins. Newspaper reporter, who’s chasing Dan’s underage niece. And he’s one of the good guys.
• Dianne Lee Hart as Terry, Dan’s underaged niece. That Dave, Dan, and others are all chasing. Apparently, the only eligible girl in northern Wisconsin!
• Bill Williams (Spaceflight IC-1) as Dutch, the bar owner.

Editorial review of The Giant Spider Invasion courtesy of Amazon.com

Set in a remote, run-down rural Wisconsin Backwater, this cult classic is reminiscent of the great ’50s giant monster features. An inebriated farmer comes across a field filled with crystal geodes. He makes the inevitable mistake of cracking one open only to reveal an extremely deadly arachnid that definitely isn’t from around here. Spawned from the other side of the universe, these creatures have traversed a black hole to wreak mayhem on our planet.