An American Carol

An American Carol, by David Zucker
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An American Carol (2008) starring Kevin Farley, Kelsey Grammer

An American Carol, by David Zucker

— €œWARNING! This movie may be offensive to children, young people, old people, in-the-middle people, some people on the right, all people on the left, terrorists, pacifists, war-mongers, fish mongers, Christians, Jews, Muslims, atheists, agnostics (though you’d have to prove it to them), the ACLU, liberals, conservatives, neo-cons, ex-cons, future cons, Republicans, Democrats, Libertarian, people of color, people of no color, English speakers, English-as-a-second language speakers, non-speakers, men, women, more women, & Ivy League professors. Native Americans should be okay. — €

Yes, that about covers it.   Although Liberals, Political Correctness, and their cherished tenets will take the most spoofing.

Product description of An American Carol

From David Zucker, the director of The Naked Gun and Airplane! comes a bare-knuckle comedy where no one is safe from the onslaught of lunacy. When obnoxious Hollywood director Michael Malone organizes a Ban the 4th of July campaign, his efforts are upended by a gang of spirits from America s past. Zucker roasts a herd of sacred cows in this latest parody featuring an all-star cast.

Funny movie quotes from An American Carol

Michael Malone (Kevin Farley): Who are these people?
General George S. Patton (Kelsey Grammer): They’re not people, they’re the ACLU!


Josh: Oh, grandpa fell asleep again.
Timm: No, he’s dead.


Timm: [upon Michael Malone arriving] Oh, look, it’s Uncle Asshole.


Michael Malone (Kevin Farley): [John F. Kennedy, George S. Patton and Bill O’Reilly slap Michael Malone]
[to Bill O’Reilly]
Michael Malone (Kevin Farley): Hey, wait a minute, you’re not a ghost!
Bill O’Reilly: I know! I just enjoy slapping you.


Mohammed (Geoffrey Arend): It is getting harder and harder to find suicide bombers. All the really good ones are gone.


Bacon Stains Malone (Gary Coleman): Don’t you worry Mas’sa Malone we got dem bacon stains out of the upholstery, just like you asked. Take over Lebron, I’ll do the limo.


Michael Malone (Kevin Farley): Look can you make them stop singing.
Rastus Malone (David Alan Grier): Hey, Mas’sa don’t wanna hear that slave shit, kick something in the fo fo.


Michael Malone (Kevin Farley): [misunderstanding his appearance] I always stood up for gay rights.
Angel of Death (Trace Adkins): I am the angel of freakin’ death, you turdhead.


Michael Malone (Kevin Farley): I love America. That’s why it needs to be destroyed. So that it can come to it’s senses.


George Mulrooney (Kevin Sorbo): [Accepting an award for a film about McCarthyism] Thank you. I dedicate this award to all the courageous filmmakers who take on tough issues like, well, McCarthyism, even though it no longer exists. Or like slavery or Nazism, even though they ended too. But you know, evil exists today like, uh, well, Islamic terrorism, but like I’m gonna make that movie, right? Like I wanna get beheaded!
[laughs and mimics being beheaded]

Trivia for An American Carol

  • The date on the headstone lists Michael Malone’s birthdate as April 20, 1952. April 20 is also the birthdate of Adolf Hitler.
  • In one scene, a portrait of Davy Crockett is seen on the wall: it’s the same portrait that appeared in Leslie Nielsen’s house in Naked Gun 33 1/3: The Final Insult – an in-joke from director David Zucker.
  • Both Wayne Knight and Frank Caliendo turned down the role of Michael Malone.

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